What Now?: Face It

People often talk about the concept of "resting bitch face."

Everyone I know who says they have it, or who are said to have it, generally does not look "bitchy" to me. They just look like women who aren't smiling. There are all sorts of sites all over the internet dedicated to explaining this phenomena, the sexism in it, and everything else, so I'll leave that to you to go find.

In the meantime, I refer you back to The Girl Scout Laws. When I was a kid and walked 20 miles uphill go get to troop meetings.... ok, that was before my time. In my day, 20 of us would pile into my troop leader's van), I had to swear every week that I would do my best to be cheerful ALL THE FUCKING TIME. Give us a freaking break!

What about folks like me? I have "resting looks like she is miserable or is about to start drooling because her mouth hangs open all on its own" face. I need a shorter name for it. I thought of "My face not in motion," but that still seems too long.

Wait! I've got it! It is my "not thinking about or aware of you right now so call it whatever the fuck you want" face. Most commonly found when I'm reading on the train, working at my desk, and possibly when I'm using the toilet, but that is done when I am alone so no one can see me. Even when there are mirrors right across, from the toilet, I Have to look away. I can't look someone (even myself) in the eye! Taking a dump is a private moment. It would be weird to know someone was watching me - even if it was only me. I hate when toilets are positioned to face mirrors!